• Ryan James Carlson

Poem by George Washington on Trump visit to Mount Rushmore

Old Mount Rushmore's mighty grand!

Giant mugs survey the land.

One must be BIG to get up there!

It's not enough to have tall hair.

Me, Thom, Abe and Roosevelt:

For all our faults, we stayed quite svelte.

The current fellow hides his size

Behind – on him – quite skinny ties.

It's true we lacked TVs and phones

and never even heard of drones.

But we all had something this guy lacks:

A lot more brains than Trumpo packs.

What does he pack, this Trumpo chap?

Thoughts that cause his gums to flap.

And flap they do, all day long.

Could I trouble you to strike a gong?

In Trumpo's mind it's not enough.

Rushmore's not quite up to snuff.

He bristles now, what are their feats

Compared to brilliant CAPS-LOCKED tweets?

“They say I'm the best,” he says.

A stable genius, a bigly pres.

But up on Rushmore, the jury's out.

Watch him preen, hear him shout!

For a president he's quite a lout.

If he gets in, I want out!

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